Advice on divorce

The end of a relationship can be devastating for a married couple, and the emotional and physical toll it takes on those involved can be difficult. Unfortunately, it is common that many relationships end acrimoniously, involving hours arguing over money, property, and children. Getting advice on divorce in order to know the laws both in your state and country is critical.

 

Of course every country has its own particular rules and legislation, so I will use the US as an example. There is a vast amount of information available that can give you advice on divorce, and innumerable businesses offering help for an additional fee (on top of the paperwork) that each state requires for filing. If you would like to do the divorce cheaply, and have little property or money to contend with, then you may want to do it yourself. This is a fairly straightforward process but will require a little research and time than if you were to have someone do it for you.

 

The first place to search if you would like advice on divorce is through the worldwide web. You can trawl through the vast amounts of information about documents and procedures for your particular situation and needs. The Internet is a good starting point to find out just where you stand legally, and normally you can get advice on divorce free from governmental websites. 

 

The Internet also showcases a wide array of organisations willing to provide advice on divorce for a small fee. These groups are schooled in the divorce process and know the process inside and out. They often will do all the paperwork for you and have representatives that can lodge your papers with the court. Depending on which site you choose, some will charge more than others for providing assistance and advice on divorce.

 

Any city council in the state that you reside in will have the correct paperwork that you can use to file for divorce. These usually come at no cost and are easily downloadable from the Internet. Their advice on divorce is normally free, but you may have to make an appointment with a counsellor who can advise you on the process. Some states require that you appear in court before issuing you the divorce decree – others require that you have been in the state longer than six months before you are allowed to file.

 

Books that provide advice on divorce are readily available at most major bookstores, and give step-by-step guidelines on how to go through the process. Filing for divorce can be a little like filing for taxes - and people can get flustered and confused with each itemized form that must be filled out. Books are a great way to understand the legal process at your own pace.

 

And lastly, lawyers are always the most known sources of advice on divorce. Be warned however, that the fees can be very high and you are not always assured on getting the result you want. Lawyers however, may be able to navigate the legal process labyrinth and will fight your case should it become messy. If you need a lawyer to speak to a judge over the rights to your children or major assets, than they will prove necessary. Who you ask for advice on divorce will largely depend on your situation, but it is advisable that you explore all options before calling up the first lawyer you know once the damage is irreparable.

 

Abusive Relationships

Nearly all of us have heard about abusive relationships. Some of us who are less fortunate might even have lived through a few ourselves. But the hard and cruel fact of life is that abusive relationships are a reality that we cannot wish away. No matter how bold the measures adopted by the state functionaries might be or how compelling the advertising campaigns centered around abusive relationships may be, they are not something that is likely to go away or even be wished away. They are an ugly reality that take a toll not just on the perpetrator and the victim, but also everyone else who happens to be a part of the equation.

 

A recent study by the department dealing with juvenile delinquency found that nearly 80% of teenage offenders came from families where abusive relationships were common. Imagine that! Eighty percent is not an errant statistic. It is practically the whole group. If one were to use this study, it would be really easy to conclude that everyone, or rather every child who has been in a household with abusive relationships, is sure to become a juvenile delinquent! Worrying as this sounds, what makes it really scary is the fact that it is the truth. And frankly, nothing much is being done to change the situation.

 

Why exactly do abusive relationships take root? And how can they be rooted out? In order to answer these questions, it is necessary to understand the nature of abusive relationships in the first place. Not all abusive relationships begin because the perpetrators are evil, wicked people who want to hurt others. In fact, the opposite may very well be true. Most abusers in abusive relationships are people who themselves have some sort of deficiency, which they try to equalize or even out through the use of force to dominate others. As is usually the case, this kind of force tends to harm others more than it heals them. Which is what leads to abusive relationships.

 

Psychologists and mental health professionals have studied abusive relationships for a very long time. And without exception, they have all found one common thread that runs through. Most abusers are otherwise charming people who often carry the burden of their deviant behavior with them in the form of lifelong guilt. And the reasons they indulge in abuse is because they don’t know how to deal with this guilt. Each episode of abuse is followed by an episode of genuine remorse which is then evened out by another episode of abuse. In a manner of speaking, it is a vicious cycle that they find themselves in and one for which they need help in order to overcome.

romance advice

In these modern times, there seems to be infinite sources for people seeking romance advice. Women have many sources at their disposal – friends, the Internet or the various selections of women’s magazines on offer, readily doling out tips on how to infuse more romance into a relationship.For men, though, finding sources of trustworthy and relevant romance advice can be harder to come by. Men don’t usually compare notes with their friends about how to be more romantic. They may search the Internet or flip through magazines in the airport departure lounge, but most likely men a lot more independent when it comes to asking or receiving advice about women.

 

Being romantic can mean all kinds of things in our current culture, and the medieval times of knights, chivalry and ladies may be long gone, though elements still remain. Being heroic, poetic and sentimental all play a part in the grand tableau of romance, but it can come in many shapes and forms. Covering a bed full of roses, drawing a bath by candlelight, making a sumptuous feast, booking a weekend away – all of these things are pieces of romance advice that we have picked up along the way.

 

For many people, getting romance advice may seem ridiculous, but for others it is critical. Some people have never done anything remotely sentimental before; and then they are suddenly confronted with a partner who appreciates the remembrance of dates, loves dinners and enjoys surprise gifts. It may be a shock and they may need help.

 

For men and women looking for ways to ignite romance in their lives, there are some basic tips that can be followed. For one, romance is something that can be spontaneous or created, but ultimately results in creating an atmosphere where a person feels loved and desired. The best romance advice I think I have heard is to be creative and inventive: think of new ways to show your partner how much you care for them. The same old flowers or box of chocolates may start to get old after a woman receives them on the same day every year. The element of surprise, but also of ingenuity, can really be a valuable piece of romance advice.

 

Finding the time to show someone that you are willing to do something romantic, idealized and even a bit exaggerated, can make them feel special. If someone gives you romance advice that you don’t feel comfortable doing (like serenading your partner outside her work building dressed as a giant rose), then it is probably safe to say that you shouldn’t do it. A woman, or a man, will really feel that you have meant everything if you enjoy your attempts and care about the end result. The best romance advice any one can give is just to say have fun, and get started.
 

Save Your Relationship and Save It for Good

You can save your relationship, even if your partner has said that they want nothing to do with you. Is it your fault? You are probably blaming yourself right now but it doesn’t matter who is to blame.

If you happen to be losing someone who you made a commitment to, then you will know what a painful experience it is. It can feel as traumatic as a death in the family. It might seem highly unlikely right now to get your husband, wife, girlfriend or boyfriend back, but one thing for sure is no split is definitely forever. Never say never. It really doesn’t matter your relationship type or your sexuality, if there was love in the relationship you can get it back. If you are constantly saying to yourself that you want to get your partner back then you must read this. Without any doubts, I can show you how.

So your partner has said that they want out of the relationship or marriage and they have told you that they are not happy and they’ve gone as far as telling you that they do not love you anymore. All you can see is a future that is filled with empty days and nights. Sometimes you really feel that you won’t live through it.

When a relationship ends, your world crashes around you and you feel like you just can’t go on. But you must and you will. For anything to change in your life you need to change! For now you need to change your mindset and take a positive attitude that will carry you through the pain.

How do you deal with your relationship breaking down?

Here is one of my magic formulas: Be the first to apologise in your relationship and be happy with the situation.

When doing this you will immediately feel a change in the atmosphere. How does it work? Doing this takes the tension out of any argument. You will straight away see the situation turn to favour you. It’s not really a magic trick, it’s common sense. Whether you’re in the wrong or in the right, and no matter what has happened, your relationship is fixable. Although this tip does initially seem counter-intuitive, it contains within it the single most powerful method for improving the quality of our relationships and indeed, finding more happiness in life.

You’ve probably spent a lot of money on professional counselling services, or you’ve taken advice from friends and relatives and you feel that they do not know what it feels like, or you’ve read other books and bits of information from other organizations, websites and people to help you get what you want. These might be excellent books and tips giving great advice, however the techniques I show you actually work quickly and not just in theory. If you have listened to advice from anyone else and so far nothing has worked, I have some FIRST STAGE instructions that can turn things round for you right now.

These first stage instructions alone could turn your situation around right now.

 

 

 

Fix Your Relationship Fast, No Doubts About It

If you’re wondering how to get your ex partner back but all you can feel is the pain of the situation, listen to this…

…Have your tried everything you can to make your ex partner reconsider their decision but as far as they’re concerned that don’t even want to talk to you? Believe it or not every relationship can be saved. It just depends on how you go about it.

It doesn’t matter what the reason is for the break up is. It can be sorted out so long as you can contain the pain and think before taking any action. Just about everyone makes the same mistakes when trying to save their relationship. Unfortunately this results in having an ex partner that no longer wants anything to do with them, and then just ignoring them totally. They then end up losing their mate for good. Don’t let this be you.

Now is the time to stop making the mistakes that lessen your chances and learn how to do it the right way.

So what is it that you truly want and why you want your ex back with you? Do you really love them? If so you must do your best to contain emotions now and avoid irrational behaviour and impulsive action. Acting in desperation is what makes things worst.

“So what do I do?”

This might not be easy to execute but you must let them go and show them that you’ve let them go emotionally. If you do this it will vastly improve your chances of getting them back. Show them that you respect and agree with their decision, and that you’re happy with the situation as it stands.

However, there are a few things that need to be avoided. Make sure you avoid contacting your ex at every moment. It is okay to speak to them now and again but it has to be small talk, happy talk for now, and nothing about the break up or you being together.

Getting under their feet and finding excuses to be in contact with them is not allowing them to know what it’s like to be without you. If you are calling, messaging and emailing them repeatedly you must stop right now. You might want to keep them in your life to avoid the reality of them slipping away but constantly contacting them will push them away fast. Your ex partner will not want to come back to a pushy, needy, whining individual that will not give them any space.

Let yours and their emotions settle, this is crucial, especially if your break up was a heated one. During the time that you’re apart you will both be forced into deciding what you really want. Use this time to work on yourself, by realising what is really important in your life, e.g. family, friends, the children, work and health. Make yourself attractive again.

These methods will turn things around fast.

Fix My Marriage and Stop My Divorce Right Now – Yes, RIGHT NOW!

We all know that divorce is becoming more and more common all the time and it seems many marriages end bitterly. Believe it or not your marriage does not have to end at all.

So how can you stop your divorce and save it from destruction? And more importantly how do they make your marriage strong? Yes we know that not every marriage is the same and all people are different, but there are certain principles about love, marriage and relationships that stay the same.

There are ways to stop making the common mistake that makes break up and divorce imminent, but instead create stronger relationships. Is this possible for you? Of course it is!
Here are some of the common mistakes that we as imperfect humans have all most likely made which increases the possibility of divorce. I have also noted some instructions that you can follow now to turn the situation round.

Promising that you’ve changed

Here are some of the common promises made, “I have changed! I promise! I’ll never let you down again!”

DON’T
You must never do this. We have all done it, and it never works. My recommendation is not to promise that you’ll change. The trouble is, the more you try this, the worse your situation becomes because you are pushing them away. Even if you really mean to change, things have probably become so bad in the relationship that this will sound like a desperate promise that you don’t mean and are just saying to make them change their mind.

DO
So what does work? There’s not much you can say to show your ex partner that you intend to change. In that case there really is no point in saying anything. If you know that there is a need for you to change, don’t tell them that you will change, just change! Actions speak louder than words. Don’t make promises, just do what you’re supposed to do with your partner and do the things you need to do without paying any lip service.

Telling them that you love them

DON’T
You might actually mean this but your ex partner will interpret this as emotional blackmail. Especially if they do really love you but are hiding it because of their own insecurity, it can make them run away because it can make them feel vulnerable. This can make your situation worse. The words “I love you” are very powerful words and if they are said at the wrong time (i.e. during a break up!) can make you look pathetic.

DO
Leave them alone and let them do what they want to do. If you stop telling them that you love them they WILL want to know if you do. Questions will start popping up in their mind. They will suddenly have urges to make contact with you, even if they go about it in the wrong way. Doing this alone could turn your situation around straight away.

Arguing or Rowing

DON’T
Arguing and trying to get your partner to see your point of view is probably the worst thing you can do. Let’s be honest, in a break up they don’t want to see your point of view. You will be tempted with the urge to defend yourself with regards to what you might have said or with regards what you did. You might even throw the blame somewhere else, but one thing is for certain, the more you argue the more they will argue back or they will leave. If you take a negative course of action they will do the same. You might even win the argument (Hooray!), but you will not save the relationship.

DO
As I mentioned earlier DO NOT ARGUE. Instead Bite your lip! Be the first to apologise even if you are not in the wrong. Don’t get drawn into an argument even if they come out with the biggest lies. Do not be tempted into defending yourself. The thing to do is to agree with your partner no matter what you feel at the time. Do not defend yourself and add fuel to the fire. Doing this will more likely chill them out, and all of the hostility will die down, and will often lead your spouse to defending you later on down the line when they’ve had the time to calm down and analyse the situation. Once you dismiss the urge to win the argument your relationship will fix itself. You don’t have to try to fix it. 

Save Your Relationship and Stop Your Break Up

Think about what it is you are trying to save.

Do you just want your ex partner back just because you feel that you can’t have them? Maybe you just don’t like the idea of your partner being with someone else? Was it an abusive or controlling relationship? Did one or both of you cheat? Just remember, it doesn’t matter what happened, it can be saved.

Be the person they fell in love with.

Chances are you were an attractive person when you first met. They might have liked your looks or your personality. How have you changed? Have you become the whining and begging individual that can’t bear to be without them? For now on, always be positive around them and everyone around you.

Control your emotions and guard what you say.

If you keep saying anything to save your relationship, you could lose the chance to get your ex partner back. Do not respond to your breakup by whining, crying and begging them to come back because this method does not work. You are just going to irritate them and drive him further away. You need to understand that even though they have initiated the breakup, they may still have feelings for you even if they don’t know it.

Use past memories to your advantage.

If they’ve ever complimented on an outfit that you have worn, wear it again. If there is a type of perfume that you have worn that they liked you wearing, wear it again. The point is you need to become attractive again. Not just to your ex partner but to everyone around you. This will definitely work in your favor.

Remember, no situation is hopeless and no break up is certain.

Every day, in fact, every minute, couples get back together regardless of the situation. No matter who cheated, or who said what. Just remember, you can change YOU now. Don’t try to change them.

Agree with the break-up.

Whenever I give advice on these situations, this seems to be the hardest to cope with. The most important thing you need to do is agree with the break-up because as long as you’re fighting against their decision you won’t be able to work towards getting them back.

Find other things to focus on.

From now on, concentrate on what you’re good at. Make your self better and make everything around you better too. If you’re good at your job, do well with that.

 

The Passion Program - Save Your Relationship